How introverts cope with change?

In a previous blog post I've shared a very interesting theory called 'Immunity to change' as well as used the 4-step method to prompt you, Readers to examine your supporting and competing beliefs when it comes to the desired change. You can read the blog post here and the journaling prompt here.

Now, it is interesting to dig a little deeper how introverts naturally approach and cope with change. Change can be sought, but often scary, it can be unwanted but inevitable, it can bring us out of our comfort zone and drain us, or charge us up due to the great positive effects it has on our life. Most certainly, our natural introverted tendencies impact our ability to embrace change. How can introversion help us deal with change and enable a more fulfilling life? On contrary, how may introversion block us from embracing change? Let's explore what effects introversion has on our change processes.

Introverts have many qualities that help with coping with change. Let's look at them.

Depth

Introverts have the tendency to think things through long and hard. This gives us the opportunity to reflect on the change process more deeply and better understand all the ins and outs of the change. Having the ability to peal the layers beneath also allows us to understand the deeper meaning and purpose of this change and how it may help us fulfill our potential. Thinking about it also allows us to get used to the idea of the desired change. Remember the quote attributed to Buddha: 'What you think, you become!"

Problem solving

Introverts are usually great analytical thinkers. We tend to look for information, compare, research and understand complex situations, break things down and set strategies to solve issues. This skillset comes very handy when we want to change. It helps us through the process of understanding what is needed and we can systematically plan the steps to get there. Our tendency to overcome challenges independently also serves us well. At the same time, our ability to maintain meaningful connections establishes a great support system that we can use in our efforts to change.

Set pace

While an extrovert may go into a change head on, we are more cautious. We've thought things through, we've made strategies and plans and now ready to take action. We take action in a well-considered manner and adaptive way. Perhaps not all at once, we are capable to introduce new routines to our lives and assess how they worked. Due to our persistence, we keep going and trying, in fact gradually approaching the change. Taking it step by step.

Despite the strengths we have to reach lasting change, we have to reflect on our typical pitfalls as well. When we exhibit them to an extreme, they can make us inflexible and ultimately limiting our chances of positive change. Let's look at what the traps may be of introverts pursuing change.

Overthinking

The downside of our ability to think analytically and deep is the tendency to overthink. This can come in many forms and shapes, most notably in self-doubt (e.g. Am I going to be able to do this?) or fear of judgement (e.g. What will others think if all of a sudden I lose this much weight?). We can be our worst enemy, self-talking ourselves into believing that it is better to just stick to what we have and what we know. This may pair with prolonging the decision making AKA analysis paralysis (e.g. Let me think it through one more time) or prolonging taking action, essentially procrastination (e.g. I'll start tomorrow/next Monday/next 1st of the month).

Preference for stability and predictability

Naturally, we introverts prefer stability and predictability. We like to know what's happening, we like to have our routine and can get very irritated when it gets disrupted. Naturally, we tend to hold onto what is familiar, the things that we know, and that is certainly a major roadblock for the change process. On top of that, we may struggle with uncertain situations and acting spontaneously in them. We prefer to put our usual patterns and behaviors on repeat.

Expressing our needs

Despite the fact that we may know and understand our needs very well, we can often struggle with expressing them. Whether that is naming the emotions or concerns we have or trying to look calm and collected, or even trying to please others, we can easily suppress our needs, emotions, stress or frustration. We may end up prioritizing others over ourselves leading to tension and being unsuccessful in our change initiative. Often, we avoid asking for help which is due to our natural tendency to act independently.

Know what really holds you back

Check out my blog post about Immunity to change and the journaling prompt to explore your competing beliefs that may stand in the way of your change.

So how can we utilize our natural tendencies to beat the change?

Take one step at a time. Set up smaller, more manageable and less scary routines that you can build into your everyday schedule. Let it sink and feel comfortable, before you move onto the next step, the next routine. This will help you to make things more predictable and less uncertain. Use your analytical skills and ability to dig deep to define what the natural progression is for you, how you can establish a step by step plan for yourself. Reflect on your needs and resources you have and don't be afraid to express them or ask for help from the friends you trust. Lastly, try to reframe hurdles to opportunities (e.g. weight loss – I get to try and experiment with ingredients that I rarely cook instead of oh no I have to eat carrots now). Challenge your negative assumptions and self-talk and turn it into positive (Remember the earlier example 'Am I able to do this?' Rephrase it to 'I know it will be hard but I can do it step by step'). While we tend to think about the worst-case scenario immediately, stop and think: 'Is that really the only scenario?' You already know the answer: Not at all.

Certainly, change is not easy, and not comfortable. Nevertheless, we introverts have a lot of personality traits and resources available for us to nail it. I wish you an inspiring and rewarding journey as you embark on your change initiatives, moving toward a more fulfilling and meaningful life.

Resources:

Dweck, C. S. (2006). Mindset: The New Psychology of Success. Random House.

Cain, S. (2012). Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking. Crown Publishing.

Loehken, S. (2014). Quiet impact: How to be a successful introvert. John Murray Learning